Self-esteem is the way you perceive your value and worth in the world based on your beliefs and thoughts.
It can be impactful with your decision-making and how you treat others.
Often, impaired self-esteem or low self-esteem can mean lashing out toward yourself, loved ones, and even strangers.
Healthy self-esteem or high self-esteem can help you to trust yourself. The benefits of healthy self-esteem can help you to build a life that you want to show up for each day.
Boosting self-esteem can feel arduous because it takes small daily actions to change the way you think about yourself and improve your confidence. You may not see your progress every day, and it may take a while to see results from healthy self-esteem.
This can lead to feeling stuck, overwhelmed, and you may feel like you want to give up.
This doesn’t mean that positive self-esteem is not possible. The benefits of healthy self-esteem are worth it, but how do you learn to boost impaired self-esteem?
It can take time.
Here are 5 ways to boost your self-esteem
1. Become Aware Of Your Thoughts.
You’ve probably heard this before, and awareness is one of the first steps to progress.
When you become aware of how you talk to yourself, you can change how you perceive your value and worth. If you are consistently using negative self talk, your mental health may be impacted.
To help change your self-talk, you may need to use a new strategy.
Here are a few strategies to use in order to become aware of your thoughts:
- Journaling
- Mindfulness
- Meditation
- Deep Breathing
2. Build Positive Relationships.
The people you surround yourself with matter to building self-esteem.
Building positive relationships doesn’t mean toxic positivity or minimizing authentic thoughts and beliefs.
It means that you grow relationships that affirm your identity and celebrate who you are as a person. Look for people who help you to feel most like the person you want to be in the world.
Here are a few ways to build strong relationships in your life:
- Join a support group
- Join a meet-up with others who enjoy the same activities as you
- Consider attending a women’s circle
- Connect with recovery programs
- Advocate or volunteer for organizations who support your values
- Seek out therapy
3. Create Boundaries.
Boundaries take self- discipline and saying no can be difficult when you really care about a person. However, self-discipline helps to increase self-trust.
When you trust yourself more, you may find that your self esteem increases. If you make a promise to yourself, keep the promise.
This supports trust in yourself.
It is better to disappoint others than continually disappoint yourself with a yes that you don’t truly mean.
Five seconds of discomfort from a no can lead to a lifetime of boosted self esteem if you are affirming your tiniest voice.
It may seem silly at first and a positive affirmation and positive thought can help. Small steps aren’t always simple, and you are worth it.
You may lose friendships based on the boundaries you set with people, and this is an indicator that you are changing.
It can be scary and boosting your self esteem may not turn out like you thought initially.
Be willing to make changes based on who you want to become instead of who you have already been.
4. Stay Active.
It’s easy to get into a pattern of not moving your body, which can lead to impaired self-esteem.
There are times when you need to sleep and rest to nurture your basic needs. Balancing activity with rest can be beneficial in boosting your self-esteem.
You can listen to yourself to take care of your most pressing need. Think about your long-term goals when things seem impossible.
When you stay active, you can create reasons to keep going. Establish how you want to show up for yourself and be gentle with yourself whether you meet the goal or not.
5. Make Mistakes.
Mistakes lead to growth, and the more you open yourself up to the possibilities that can happen after a mistake the better you become at resiliency in regard to failing.
You will not always succeed with your goals and what you set out to do.
The trick is to learn how to make mistakes so that you can be gentle with yourself and continue to move forward. Accept that mistakes are part of living a life.
A growth mindset can help you to achieve healthy self esteem. Challenge yourself to use the word yet when you feel stuck or exhausted.
You may have to act as if you are your own best cheerleader until you actually become your own best cheerleader.
Boosting your self-esteem takes effort. It is a slow, continuous process that is made up of small steps each day.
It is reframing extreme thinking, negative self talk, and learning how to surround yourself with people you love.
The Benefits Of A Healthy Self-Esteem
When you boost your self-esteem, you may notice benefits that include:
- Knowing you’re okay
- Knowing you have value and matter
- Show integrity and honesty
- Feel happy for others when they achieve success
- Improve self-discipline
- Meet goals
- Feel satisfied in personal and professional relationships
- Accept others and yourself
When the challenge of boosting your self-esteem becomes overwhelming, there are therapists who can help. You don’t have to struggle alone to be okay.
In fact, advocating for your needs is a first step to boosting your self-esteem.
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Written by: Randi Thackeray, MA
Clinically Reviewed and Edited by: Julie Reichenberger, MA, LPC, ACS, ACC
